Elsa in “Frozen” made it sound so simple to just let it go.
But, it’s not always easy. In fact, it’s one of the biggest challenges I see among my clients and students – letting go of things – regardless of whether they can or can’t control them – because they haven’t granted themselves permission to do so.
And so many times, they want to go straight to the HOW of things instead of first determining the WHAT, WHO and WHY and getting to the root of what they want. They ask questions like:
- HOW do I get clients?
- HOW do I write my contract?
- HOW do I tell my client I hate him and don’t want to work with him anymore?
- HOW much should I charge or make in my job?
Can you relate? If so, I want you do one thing right now: Pump the BRAKES. Let’s get to the root of it all.
I LOVE helping clients and students to see things they’re missing and be honest with themselves. For example:
- Instead of asking, “HOW do I get clients?” I want to know what kind of clients you want, why those clients and who made you decide to do this work?
- Instead of asking, “HOW do I write my contract?” I want to know what you’re trying to achieve with the contract, what’s the end goal and have you thought about all the pieces of the puzzle that go into the contract as well as all the terrible things that you want to avoid with clients?
- Instead of asking, “HOW do I tell my client I hate him or her and don’t want to work with them anymore?” I ask why do you hate them (sometimes, it’s a manifestation of some other thing that you’ve been procrastinating – like following your own deadlines that are unreasonable to begin with and we put it all on others, right?)
- And instead of asking, “HOW much I should charge to make in my job?” again, I go back to the questions of YOU and all the things that make you, well, YOU.
SPOILER ALERT: There is no single “right” or perfect answer … there is no secret to success.
And anyone who tells you that, or tries to sell you that is lying to you.
I absolutely hate when people sell unethically. So, I’ve given myself permission to be transparent, tell people how I feel and think, and if we jibe, great! If we work together, we work together. And if not, that’s cool, too because I want what’s best for you.
Even if we don’t work together now, we probably will in the future. Why? Because you’ll remember that I told you that the answer is within yourself and when you’re ready to look deep with me for it, I’ll be there and you’ll know I didn’t push you or try to use manipulative, fear-based, fake scarcity tactics to get you to work with me or do what is best for yourself.
You may not be ready yet, and that’s okay. But one day you will be, and I will still be here, waiting to support you and be your cheerleader.
As you go about your day, think about these questions:
- Whenever you think to yourself, “Oh, I can’t do that,” “I could have done that,” “I shouldn’t do that,” or “I wished I did that,” ask yourself WHY.
- Get curious. Figure out what or who is holding you back.
- Once you identify it, acknowledge it and then do something about it.
- Give YOURSELF permission. Let go of unreasonable expectations. Go intentionally towards what you want.
- Start slow, start small. Take small, baby steps toward what you want. You got this!
Take the plunge. 💦 Sign up for my email list to get notifications on new podcast episodes, free resources, behind the scenes activities, VIP Pre-Public Access, discounts, and more!